As members of the mainstream media, we’re understandably uneasy about asking the hard questions – and delivering even the harder answers! That’s why when integrity is called for, we call upon Dr. Sebastian Krackbone, Professor of Cosmic Entropy at the Eberhard Karls University of Tubingen, to weigh in on the Sun Belt’s most penetrating queries.

Georgia State basketball is going to be pretty bad again, right?

Dr. Krackbone: I think not! Jonas Hayes, an assistant on the Xavier team that won the 2022 NIT Championship, experienced some first-year pain as head coach of the Panthers, but the man put on his Recruiting Tyrolean and delivered the third-best recruiting class and the conference’s best (and most robust) transfer class for 2024. 6’5″ senior guard Toneari Lane is a SBC Second Team selection and is a certified filler of buckets. Expect a slow start for the Panthers as its seven transfers gel, but they’ll emerge stronger as the conference tournament arrives.

Did James Madison Retreat or Reload?

Dr. Krackbone: Nothing weakens the Sun Belt like success! Coach Mark Byington parlayed another successful season, a SBC Championship, and a win over Wisconsin in the first round of the NCAA Tournament into a gig at Vanderbilt. Furthermore, stars like T.J.Bickerstaff, Terrence Edwards Jr., Justin Amadi, Hollman Smoth and Noah Freidel have moved on or transferred out. The Dukes bounced back by hiring Morehead State’s Preston Spradlin, who immediately reloaded with four fine transfers, including a pair of 6’11” gigantischriesigs, plus brought in SBC preseason First Team guard Mark Freeman, who led Morehead State to 2022-23 OVC regular-season title. Does JMU feature comparable firepower to last year’s championship team? Nope. But they remain the Dukes of Danger nonetheless.

Why Did Troy Get a First Place Vote?

Dr. Krackbone: Scott Cross didn’t do much recruiting this off season. He didn’t have too. Nearly the entire 2023-24 team elected to stay on for this season, including forward Myles Rigsby and Sun Belt Sixth Man of the Year Tayton Conerway. While the Trojans spent much of last season in first place, Troy faded significantly by the end of the year, falling to third place and getting bounced by Texas State in the SBC Tournament. Perhaps this year’s version of the team has built more ausdauer to endure a full season? Ausdauer or not, the team still has Scott Cross, and they will make some kine of a run. Just not for first place.

Who Will Come Out of Nowhere?

Dr. Krackbone: [hearty German laughter] Not ULM!

Who Will Disappoint?

Dr. Krackbone: Not only has Louisiana lost star forward Kobe Julian to rival Arkansas State, the Cajuns lost 6’8″ forward Hosana Kitenge for the season. Those two, combined with Joe Charles (who transferred to McNeese), were the heart of last year’s fifth place team. But the team headed for the biggest fall is Appalachian State, last year’s regular conference champion but also a victim of portal decimation. Major producers like Tre’Von Spillers, Justin Abson, Jordan Marsh and Terence Harcum have bid Boone tschüssi. Don’t count out the motivational abilities of Dustin Kern, though.

PHOTO: From the archives of the German Secret Police