I think some (maybe most) of you are well-meaning. After all, nobody wants ill-will wished upon scrappy college football programs who made the NCAA College Football Playoffs by “pulling themselves up by their bootstraps” and “playing the game the right way.” I mean come on! You’re not heartless jerks. You love Cinderella (as long as she knows her role). You have ten teams in the Playoffs. You are more than gracious enough to allow two schools that aren’t in your pay grade to participate. You are very generous people. Thank you.

However, I cannot help but to see that the majority of people recommending that the Group of Six “host their own playoff” are Power Four supporters who (let’s face it) secretly believe that James Madison should do the right thing and let Notre Dame take their place. And if we’re being totally honest, Tulane should do the same. Why unfairly punish the poor players from Texas?

I get it! You think you’re being altruistic by putting some real thought into these hypothetical brackets, tossing in a handful of schools you sort of heard about and announcing “You can have your own playoffs! Think of it!” You say it with the same condescension as Walter Hobbs telling his son Buddy about the mailroom. Wouldn’t that be fun?

I really do get it. You don’t want us in your room touching your stuff or talking to your friends. If you build us a tree fort in the backyard, maybe we’ll leave you alone. But here’s the fact of the matter, Pal: we earned the spot by playing by your rules. You said if we win our games, if we win our conference, we would have our chance in the The Playoffs. You said that.

Stop proposing a G5 playoffs. Just stop. Because you know what would happen if such a thing was wished into existence? There would be some initial buzz – new car smell – and then a rapid fizzle. The G5 Championship game might be on ESPN2, but probably on ESPNU. The ESPN commentators would spend halftime cheerfully discussing the “real” Playoff matchups or wonder aloud which players and coaches on the gridiron were destined for “a call up” to the Power 4. In short, the G6 Playoffs would accomplish exactly what you want – our remaining relevance sapped and dispersed into the ether.

I’m paraphrasing the great Pete Fiutak here, but every year at season’s start, all 134 FBS teams must believe that have a shot at the Playoffs. That’s the only way this works. Because when you deny everyone but a handful a sliver of hope, you simply created a loaded and boring power structure for the wealthy. You have allowed corporations to control a narrative that benefits them and them only. In short, when you propose a G6 Playoffs, you are just a tool.

But man, thanks for thinking of us.

IMAGE: An AI Monstrosity