I’d totally watch a 6-episode Ted origin story. When did he buy that recliner? Where does he work? Does he even know how many children he has?

Thing is, some people like beets. And when you say that “beets suck,” you’re implying that people who like beets sort of suck, too. I didn’t intend to insult lovers of beets. I just don’t like beets. But a small fraction of people who like a good beet will remember your slander forever.